Theresa May ridiculed for claiming Brexit is ‘95% complete’

May in the House of Commons as it debates Brexit. - Credit: PA

Theresa May’s insistence that her Brexit deal is 95% complete aimed to win over Tory MPs – but was widely ridiculed both online and offline.

The prime minister said that the ‘shape of the deal across the vast majority’ of the withdrawal agreement was now clear.

She told the Commons that ‘important progress’ has been made on issues like security, transport and services.

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‘And all of this from the last three weeks alone, is in addition to the agreements we had already reached.’

Therefore she believed that ‘taking all of this together, 95% of the withdrawal agreement and its protocols are now settled’.

But she warned: ‘As I set out last week, the original backstop proposal from the EU was one we could not accept, as it would mean creating a customs border down the Irish Sea and breaking up the integrity of the UK.

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‘I do not believe that any UK prime minister could ever accept this. And I certainly will not.’

The claim that her plan is ‘95% complete’ – 851 days since the UK voted to leave the European Union – has been ridiculed both on social media and in the Commons.

I'm delighted to confirm I'm 95% of the way to a new job. I've written a CV, updated my LinkedIn and bought a new pair of shoes. I just need some interviews. And a job.
— Rowena Kay (@rowena_kay) October 22, 2018

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Lord Adonis said: ‘May’s Brexit deal is 95% complete – like a plane is 95% complete without the right wing.’

Labour’s Peter Dowd told the Commons: ‘May I remind the House that 95% of the Titanic’s journey was completed successfully.’

Brexit is 95% complete. Unfortunately there is not enough memory, skill or sense to download the last 5% and the operation will need to be cancelled and system shut down immediately to avoid damage.
— Fearnan Booyeb (@TiernanDouieb) October 22, 2018

Theresa May says Brexit is 95% complete, like a skyscraper that is only missing the ground floor.
— Boris Johnson  . . . . . not (@BorisJohnson_MP) October 22, 2018

'Brexit deal is 95% complete' - May will tell MPs in crunch speech.

It's still unusable though... pic.twitter.com/cypIpt8Cva
— Denis Skinner (@BolsoverBeast) October 22, 2018

'May's Brexit deal is 95% complete'

- like a plane is 95% complete without the right wing
— Andrew Adonis (@Andrew_Adonis) October 22, 2018

Cars are useless without the 5% that includes the wheels. Like to see how May calculates her Brexit plan's 95% complete
— Kevin Maguire (@Kevin_Maguire) October 22, 2018

Theresa May, red-eyed and stinking of Red Bull, says the Brexit Deal is '95% done' - she just needs to double space it, inflate the word count with some quotes, and pad out the bibliography so it looks like she's done the required reading.
— Kevin (@kvn_dnls) October 22, 2018

PM's claim 'deal 95% done' is utter misrepresentation, designed to make you think #Brexit is nearly over...when reality is divorce terms are merely clearing of the throat before arduous five years+ negotiation on future trading relationship. More like 5% done! (Ask Singapore...) pic.twitter.com/Tk1etlsq8n
— Chris Leslie (@ChrisLeslieMP) October 22, 2018

The claim that the UK's EU withdrawal agreement is 95% complete is every PhD student ever talking to their supervisor as the immovable submission deadline looms.
— Stuart Wilks-Heeg (@StuartWilksHeeg) October 22, 2018

- Morning, Border
- Hello, Jean
- You're looking cheerful
- The Withdrawal Agreement is 95% settled, Jean
- That's great. What about the other 5%
- That's me
- And you are?
- 100% unsolved. Yes, I see your point, Jean
- Have a nice day, Border
— The Irish Border (@BorderIrish) October 22, 2018